Foster Personal Growth

“We shape our selves, to fit this world,

and by the world, are shaped again.”

– DAVID WHYTE

Is there a behavior, habit, or way you currently see yourself that is no longer serving you? Does your career path, relationship, or state of well-being need to shift or change? Then you are in the right place; keep reading for the four ways that you can begin to foster personal growth for yourself.

 We come equipped with an inner guidance system that helps us move toward or away from certain experiences as we grow up. You may be the type of child that leaps off the sofa or the type that would never dream of leaping off the sofa. What we are drawn to or against become our habits, patterns, and tendencies which settle in and create a comfort zone. These habits make up the basis of our personality, our identity. Whether it is conscious or unconscious, we learn to set ourselves up to reinforce this identity. We develop neural pathways in our brain that become well grooved, traveled over and over again. When we take the well-worn pathway, we feel competent, accepted, and worthy, so we get better and better at those habits and behaviors. Eventually, this is what starts to limit our effectiveness and often happiness. Then when we want to make a shift, change, or the situation changes it can be difficult to do so.   

Good news, we have the capacity to be self-generative, to be a continuous learner, and to create new neural pathways. We can make wise choices that come from inside ourselves, from an inner state of understanding. Fostering growth and change with the greatest level of awareness and resourcefulness is possible. Utilizing a genuine curiosity about who you are, incorporating grounded presence, and looking at the true reality of a situation brings the ability to form those new neural pathways and, therefore, effective, and lasting change.

4 Ways to Foster Personal Growth

No. 1:  Observe Yourself

The simple, AND difficult, ability to observe yourself in action. Think about watching yourself on a movie screen. How are you sitting or standing? Who and what is around you? What is your mood? Energy level? Increasing your ability to be receptive, centered, and hold a grounded presence is crucial.  This takes practice, time, and focus. I have heard it said that the skill is not to be in constant presence but to always come back to it. 

No. 2:  Find Acceptance 

Listen with patience, curiosity, and with an open heart to others and yourself. Whatever arises in the moment, meet it with non-judgment. Finding acceptance does not mean condoning it or all-inclusive agreement. It instead requires that we be honest with ourselves about what we are reacting to. Are we judging ourselves or others, what are the associated feelings and sensations that are coming up? Look for understanding around how we identify with and internalize certain values, beliefs, and rules. 

No. 3:  Pause and Choose

Each moment is a moment of choice. Pause, observe yourself, accept what you are feeling, and your reactions. Stop and pause before moving directly into a habitual behavior or a well-worn neural pathway. This will delay your response so that you can take a few deep breaths and center yourself. Give yourself some space to choose to do something different. This is not suppressing your feelings. It is helping you identify, show more discernment, and change the behavior that is no longer serving you. 

No. 4:  Commit to Practice

Personal growth and effective change are a process that takes regular practice and commitment. To learn something new, it takes a combination of observing, understanding, experience, and repetitive practice. You may have heard that energy flows where my intention goes. Having the motivation and intent to commit to practicing is easier when you can see the potential joy, release of pain, and the freedom that comes with fostering growth.

“It’s okay to dissolve in the process of creating yourself.

It’s okay to leave parts of you behind if they no longer serve

a purpose in becoming who you are.”

-JUANSEN DIZON

If you could benefit from one to one coaching to help you observe, accept, pause, and make wise choices, then please click on the link below for a complimentary coaching conversation. Practicing new ways of personal growth is a lot easier with support.